If Only

[islander]

My dearest friend, Carol, wrote this and sent it to me at a time when I was destroying my life.

IF ONLY

I have a friend
She's lost at the moment
She's falling free
Falling towards the darkened locked windows

She thinks she's going somewhere though
That is not drab, not dreary
Not tedious, not boring

Somewhere her thoughts will become as crisp
As bleached white sheets that hang frozen on the line
Someplace where the sound of snow crunching underfoot
Will clear the fog that blinds her

If only the sun will always shine in this place
and the bare branches in the cold yard will be unable to reach her

Is it the handful of pills she takes each day
The voodoo zombie they make her
That she struggles to escape, and so
Has she wandered out too far and staggered onto the ice of a pond
Where the ice might not be solid

Hoping to find something there, some part of life
Bigger than herself

If only the force of my touch
Could sail her through the darkened locked windows
Through the impending storms, the frightening chaos
Away from the hollow isolation

And into the womblike world
So craved

If only.

[Butterscotch]

Thank you for sharing that - Carol has an amazing way with words