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Tips and Tricks for Christmas survival

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    General Topics Tips and Tricks for Christmas survival

    Hello everyone. I thought I'd start a thread about how we manage to 'get through' Christmas. Although there are those who enjoy Christmas and can't wait until that time of year, there are people who find Christmas difficult. How do we cope with the stresses of Christmas?

    I find shopping in malls very overwhelming, never mind the crowds at Christmas. I do all my shopping by the end of November to avoid the crowds. I also give money and gift cards to some, and order what I can on line.

    I send Christmas cards to a select few. I like to write a little personal note in them so I make sure they're done in the first week in December.

    I particularly dislike Christmas parties, especially work related. I still have one a year with some girls from one of my old jobs to go to. We have remained friends over the years. I enjoy these girls but do much better with one on one. I go to the party early and leave early. I either drive myself or go with someone who I know will be leaving the party early. There's always a few with kids that need to get home.

    Trying not to gain weight at Christmas is a challenge. I have been brought up to eat everything on my plate. I worry about offending the cook if I don't eat 'enough'. I also have a weakness for chocolates! Needless to say I gain weight every year at Christmas. People joke about weight gain at Christmas, but I don't think it's funny at all.

    Family... I could devote a whole chapter about family. There are very few who don't come from a dysfunctional family, at least to some degree. I am the 'black sheep' in our family. Even though I have a family full of health professionals, only one of them acknowledges and understands mental illness. It's sad really. They don't understand why I'm no longer working, they identify themselves by the work they do. There is a history from the past that still haunts me. Even with all that, there are family members I do like to see. Unfortunately they come as a package.
    AJ

    Humans punish themselves endlessly
    for not being what they believe they should be.
    -Don Miguel Ruiz-

    #2
    Hello AJ. Good Suggestions. I'll add that I often do my shopping late at night or early in the morning when the stores aren't as busy.

    At Christmas parties( family Christmas dinners etc) I like to take frequent breaks , even if it means going for a quick walk or hiding out in the washroom for 5 minutes.

    I also try not to sit down for any longer than I have too. I don't really like mingling, but I find that easier than getting trapped in one spot listening to a drunken relative tell me what's wrong with society(or what's wrong with me).

    Often I don't even really mingle, but rather flit from person to person asking about their families, studies, health whatever.

    Like AJ, there are some family members that I'd rather not even mingle with, but I find that keeping on the offensive (how's your family, how's your health etc) and then moving on, prevents them from bringing up topics I'd rather not hear about. Take Care. paul m
    "Alone we can do so little;
    Together we can do so much"
    Helen Keller

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      #3
      Paul I really like the bathroom break idea, and going on the offensive with family. People generally like to talk about themselves if given the opportunity.
      AJ

      Humans punish themselves endlessly
      for not being what they believe they should be.
      -Don Miguel Ruiz-

      Comment


        #4
        I keep really busy with the cooking. We have a huge family so it can get really overwhelming. I take breaks downstairs in my bedroom when the noise gets too much or take a break outside in the carport. I've hidden in the bathroom downstairs for a few minutes too, ah the peace and quiet!

        I do most of my shopping on-line. I haven't done any socializing this year and will try to avoid it all together. I may visit one very good friend but that's about it and it's one on one.

        Boxing day is my day to do nothing. I rarely get out of my pj's, sleep as late as I want and we do turkey sandwiches for dinner. Everyone fends for themselves.

        Comment


          #5
          A PJ day is a good day.
          AJ

          Humans punish themselves endlessly
          for not being what they believe they should be.
          -Don Miguel Ruiz-

          Comment


            #6
            I will agree that on-line shopping is great! When I did venture out to the stores, it was on a snowy Monday... there was barely a car in the parking lot!
            My family no longer gets together over Christmas, so I just have my BF's family to contend with. They are all pretty easy going. I'm pretty lucky all-in-all!!
            This year I put up a few lights and decorations in the house for myself. I think it's the first year I've decorated because I wanted to... it felt great!
            Work is very busy, what with all the Christmas parties at the restaurant. One more crazy week left. I've decided that working in a restaurant over the holidays is much better that working retail over the holidays. Both jobs are with the public, but in the restaurant, all the clients are there to celebrate and enjoy. I had to make a brief stop at a Canadian tire last Saturday, and memories of working retail at Christmas came flooding back... both clients and clerks looked like they could use a 6 month vacation!!

            Only 6 more days til daylight hours start to increase!!
            Kaight

            Comment


              #7
              Great thread idea AJ. This year I’m trying to avoid Christmas altogether but as I’m finding it doesn’t negate the stresses completely. I used to grin and bear it I'd shut down at Christmas block everyone out so I could be present yet not present. I was there solely for show. I am a little glad to be trying something different.

              Best Wishes to everyone on their Christmas adventures

              Comment


                #8
                Wish I had some tips.......I try to keep perspective and enjoy the brief time with my kids.
                Good luck to everyone!

                Comment


                  #9
                  Tips and tricks eh? Well, I have lots but don't necessarily use them, mainly because I forget. I'll put them forward here anyway and hope they help somebody. (Posting them will help me if no-one else.)

                  Every year I am reminded of what *not* to do at Christmas time .

                  I do not host parties if at all possible, because I plain suck at party-hosting. I do not attend every single event going. I do not give gifts to everyone and their dog (unless I really love the dog ). I do not refuse unexpected gifts; I did that once and it didn't turn out well. I do not give expensive gifts, nor do I request them (I tell people early on). I do not shop at peak hours if at all avoidable, or when the pension/child tax credit cheques have just come out . I do not send cards every year but when I want to, I enjoy it. I do not look at a Sears catalogue any more, because it can be a slippery slope. I do not try and do everything in one day, or even one week. I do not donate to every charity that asks, just to those I choose. I do not - or at least try not to - kick myself because I am not doing enough for Christmas. The other guy's version of *enough* and my version are not usually the same; it's not a competition.

                  I have also learned to do certain things, like decide what's important to me and let the rest be "bonus". I make "appointments" to spend time with busy people who are important in my life, because it's too easy for that time to get lost in the shuffle. These usually end up being some of the most precious times, especially if young people are involved. Making a gingerbread house and playing board games works for me. I may only spend part of a day at it, but what a special day . I go to church on Christmas Eve, although I don't go much otherwise. It holds meaning for me, and I'm sometimes surprised when certain "non-religious" people are pleased to join me. I participate in the whole turkey-meal, family-gathering, over-gifting, fancy-decorating traditions whether I feel like it or not. In the big picture it's more than worth it, and I usually have fun once my anxiety has calmed down. Some years it has taken all my gumption to get myself involved, and other years it's relatively easy. It helps when I remember that Christmas is not all about the 24 hours called December 25th, it's about certain moments throughout the season that become precious memories, and about my faith.

                  This year I'm trying to practice two things in particular, things I struggle with on an ongoing basis: (1) pace myself and (2) don't concern myself with judgement by others. If I look after these two things, I will be ok.

                  Anyway, that's my long meandering post about surviving, getting through and coping with the stresses of what we call Christmas these days. This time of year presses so many buttons in pretty much everybody. I wish all of us the ability to find some enjoyment and love over the next little while, even if only a little bit.
                  uni

                  ~ it's always worth it ~

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