I have a son 22 with mental health issues anxiety, depression, adhd and some traits of borderline personality disorder and living at home. He self medicates using alcohol and drugs to cope with his illnesses and it is very difficult to watch. All through his teenage years he was seen by doctors and counselors to try to help him with various issues as well as put on medications he was not fond of. He did seem to have his life together when he had a girlfriend, but when that came down crashing, he hit bottom. He doesn't deal with disappointment very well. At one time he was able to hold a full time job and he did very well, but that disappeared quickly after his breakup. Each job after he lost quicker and only got worse over time and now he's not working. I'm so sad watching him through his life down the tubes. He now wants to move out because we have rules and because we want to increase his rent so we can save a little bit of money for him for his future instead of him wasting it away. Its very minimal and its for his advantage, but he just sees it as if he moves out and pays a several hundred more he can do what he wants and when he wants living with a friend. Him moving scares me to death. He moved out once before and was not in good shape when he came back home. I'm feeling like I've been having to handle this all on my own, since my son was little up to now because I get no emotional support from my husband throughout our marriage. I feel we've grown apart and feel so disconnected. I'm severely depressed and so unhappy. I'm so overwhelmed with too much on my plate and alot in my head and can't finish any project, task or think straight anymore. It's so scary. I don't know what to do. Some days I feel like running away. Any advice?
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Sounds a bit like my son except he has never really had a job. He does nothing. -
Its difficult to watch my son live his life that way. It really makes me sad and is stressful.Comment
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I am so sorry to hear of your very difficult situation... so much to deal with. I don't have children, so I can only imagine what it must be like to watch your own son suffer so profoundly.
What sorts of things are you doing to deal with your own depression? Are you able to talk to a councillor? A therapist? Someone who would make sure that you are looked after too.
I hope that you can secure some help, you shouldn't have to deal with this all on your own.
Take care,
KaightComment
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Hello Kaight, thanks for your response. I was going to counseling for a while to help deal with the addiction part of my sons situation as addictions end up affecting more than just the users. Its emotionally exhausting because he's my son and I care so much. I know he can do so much better for himself.
I'm just feeling overwelmed with alot and I'm not dealing with stress very well these days. I seem to want to shut down. My depression seems to be hitting me hard these days and when stress is added it worsens for me. I'm going to see my family doctor soon to talk with her about a medication adjustment.
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Good idea to go see your doctor Strugglesinmyhead. I hope that you continue with counselling or maybe with a 'family of addiction' type support group (like Al-anon) and of course keep in touch here. This is just my personal opinion, but having physical/emotional support from people is vital. (I have tried getting better without support, it did not go well! )
My thoughts are with you Stugglesinmymind,
(((Hugs)))
KaightComment
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Hello Strugglesinmyhead. Just coming onto the forum is a step in the right direction. You ask for advice, well I don't have anything too profound to share. I do know that if even one person in an unhealthy situation gets themselves healthier, it's a win-win in the long run. It sounds like you're trying to do that
uni
~ it's always worth it ~Comment
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