Is this normal?

[Chrispy]

For most of my life I have questioned what I have felt from others. It often doesn't match what they say. They are putting out sharp tones, feeling turbid to me, troubled and yet when I ask them, they say "nothing's wrong". So I always felt wrong. I'm not pretending to be with special sensitivity, but I'm ashamed of always feeling wrong about people. It's like I don't know them at all sometimes.

[paul m]

Hello Chrispy. I cant say that I get upset when I run into people who say one thing and then do something else. I can be overly judgmental at times. I try not to do that, but it took s lot of practice. paul m

[Chrispy]

Fair enough.

[Kaight]

Hi Crispy,

I am sooooo glad you shared this!! I find myself observing the same thing frequently. It leaves me feeling that I am the one who just doesn't understand social cues. It is very confusing to say the least.

I must admit however, that I do the same thing... I am notorious for saying I'm OK when I am not, for example. The thing is, I don't really know my own feelings... its not a good place to be. I find emotions creeping up on me and I don't know their cause or how to deal with them.

I was fairly socially isolated for most of my life and the role models I had did not show emotion... and therefore never taught me how to recognise and deal with feelings that might arise. I think, (though maybe I've misread peoples' responses) that this lack of cohesion between my feelings and ability to express and deal with them, makes me less relatable and perhaps not so fun to have around. This sucks.

I am working on this. I have managed to be a bit more honest now and again, and sometimes I actually trust my own emotions and don't look to others to tell me what I am feeling. I Feel I bit of relief. Not everyone likes the honesty tho.

Take care,
Kaight