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[paul m]

Hello Everybody. As most of the older members here know I've been missing in action for a while and only periodical in action for longer than that. It's been a rough year physically and I'm always at a low point mentally around this time in the spring.

There is an old saying that goes " If I had known I was going to live this long I would have taken better care of myself " . It's been attributed to many, including Mickey Mantle (former baseball great who had a long time battle with alcoholism).

I have a little different attitude " if I had known I was going to be as ill as this at this age I would have treated my body a lot worse when I was younger" LOL. Just kidding, however it is a little frustrating to know that none of my illnesses have been caused by hard living and in fact there is little that I could have to prevent getting them. Having said all of that, I know that many others have not enjoyed their life as much as I have. I figure that I'm about 50-50 right now, that is 50% of my life has been good to great and about 50% has been bad to hellish. I know many who have not even came close to enjoying 50% of their life so I consider myself lucky to have had many good moments.

I have been keeping up with reading most of the posts but I do apologize to everyone for not replying to anyone and too AJ for not carrying my share of the load recently. Hopefully I've gotten my meds straighten around and most issues under control and I'll be back posting more or less like usual. Ironically it's been the physical aspects of my life that I've to make some med changes in and not the mental ones. Take Care. paul m

p.s to all of the new comers. A belated welcome to the forums.

[AJ]

Hi Paul,

I'm so sorry to hear that you've not been well physically and that mentally spring is a tough time for you. I hope the med changes make a difference in your health. We are the sum of all aspects of our being, so no matter what our struggles and challenges are, it all affects our well being.

No need to apologize, life happens and I'm glad you took the time away that you needed to take care of you! Welcome back Paul.

[MoMoe]

Hi Paul
Sorry to hear you haven't been well. I haven't been on this site very long so I wouldn't have noticed if you have been more absent than usual. On the contrary, I believe you have responded to the majority of my posts. I hope you are feeling better soon but I just wanted you to know that regardless, you have offered me some really good words of encouragement and lots of useful advice/suggestions so I thank you for that.

[Thtufus]

And I haven't been here very long either. So I wasn't aware that you've been away. I've been reading back through the months and years about how people are living with mood disorders and I've learned a lot from your posts. I appreciate your participation in this forum over the years.

I am happy that you are feeling somewhat better, and hope that you are feeling weller sooner. Thank you for being here for us.

Thtufus

[Determined]

I hope you are doing better Paul. I am not as active as I once was but I check in daily. From a personal perspective your presence has been missed. Your words have always been helpful right from the first time I found the forum. I remember those days with mixed emotions along with the awesome people that have passed through here.

Take care of yourself.

[paul m]

Hello Everyone. Thx for your kind words and well wishes. You've all helped me in some way too. I know most of what I've learned about mental health is from interacting with people with mental health problems similar to mine.

I can honestly say that by reading your posts , looking up items for people who post questions and in general being in touch with our community , that I have learned far more here than I've ever learned in any doctors office.

I've had some good doctors, but few docs spend the time explaining A) our illnesses to us B) the possible course that our illness may take in the future C) just how long it may take to get better D) what to expect from our meds, both positive and negative wise and finally E) what other resources there are out there.

So, as I said , most of what I've learned has came from people like you, so thank you for that. Anyways I better quit before I start getting up on my soap box and making speeches about the improvements needed in the medical system. I must be getting better, I'm starting to get the strength to haul out the soap box again LOL. Thx again and Take Care. paul m

[Determined]

I agree with you Paul. Glad that you are feeling better.