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Living with Anxiety/Depression. 50 years on...

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  • uni
    replied
    Welcome Living with Hope! Wow, so many elements of your story mirror my own. Thank you for putting things into words so clearly. I hope you continue to do ok, and post again

    Leave a comment:


  • paul m
    replied
    Hello Living with hope and welcome. Thx for sharing your story. Take Care. paul m

    Leave a comment:


  • Living with hope
    replied
    Hi AJ.

    Thanks for having me.

    I just want to put my introductory post into perspective; While it's true, my life is in a pretty good place at the moment, it isn't all roses & sunshine.
    I still have my struggles like everybody else. Been having some these past few weeks actually. But I just want to encourage people to seek help
    and that there is always help.

    Leave a comment:


  • AJ
    replied
    Hi Living With Hope and welcome. Thank you for sharing your journey of hope!

    Leave a comment:


  • Living with hope
    started a topic Living with Anxiety/Depression. 50 years on...

    Living with Anxiety/Depression. 50 years on...

    Hello everyone!
    I am a newcomer here & am glad I found a site where I can share my experiences with others who can relate.
    I am a happily married man & have struggled with Anxiety and Depression the majority of my life.
    As I write this, I am currently in a good spot in my life, largely due to the support of my Wife, who has literally changed my entire life around.
    Because of this, I want to share with you that it IS possible to live a happy & productive life with Mental Illness.
    First off, if you one of the MILLIONS of us who suffer from Depression, or Anxiety, it's important to know you're living your life at a disadvantage to some,
    and therefore you can take credit for all that you've achieved in your life!
    We are at a disadvantage in that simple actis like standing in a lineup, or even going out to socialize, things that others take for granted can be quite traumatic
    for some of us. In fact, so much so that it can be quite crippling. I myself have been at a point where I was afraid to even step outside my door & even couldn't hold a
    job at times. In those days, I as so miserable & lonely I couldn't see any future for myself. Yet...here I am today. A survivor of those days & ready to offer support for
    those of you who may have been in a similar situation.
    I guess it all started for me in my late teens. It was hard enough struggling with the challenges of adolescence without having to deal with Anxiety!
    Back then, & we're talking mid to late 1980's now, Depression was more just an emotion than a Mental Illness. In other words, you felt "depressed", or sad.
    We had so little information back then & therefore were quite ignorant to just how crippling Depression could be.
    In those days, if you felt "Depressed" you either smoked, or drank your problems away, which of course, we know today as being just another manifestation Depression.
    But in 1987, I was a timid socially anxious Teenager, afraid of his own shadow. My father couldn't understand how things like walking by a group of people
    could be downright terrifying for me. Of course, I had no idea something was wrong then either. how could I? I was too afraid to socialize or make any connections.
    As far as I knew, I was just a person scared of his own shadow & that was just who I was.
    Later, it would affect my professional life, as I sure as hell didn't want to work in office, or any other kind of social environment.
    Enter the wonderful world of Security. A job where I could avoid people while working Graveyard shift.
    While this seemed like the ideal solution at the time, it would only serve to worsen my Anxiety, as I became further & further detached from people &
    the everyday workings of the "Normal" world.
    Still having no idea anything was wrong, I continued to work graveyard shifts wherever I could, right up to the mid 1990's when I took a job that was shift work
    & I would soon begin to struggle with the social aspect of working the Day & afternoon shifts sometimes.
    Things ultimately came to a head for me in 2000, when I had a Nervous Breakdown. The first sign to me that something was wrong.
    I was diagnosed at the time as having sever Social Anxiety & was put on Paxil, which quickly proved to be a disaster!
    In 2003, I was introduced to Effexor, which would end up being a Game Changer for me. Too much so at first. Overnight I had gone from a high-strung
    paranoid person to a doped up Zombie who now wasn't living life, I was simply existing.
    It took years of experimenting with the right dosage until I was able to finally find the right amount to still let me feel something, yet could still take the edge off.
    Though immensely improved over my former self, it still wasn't perfect as I would suffer a few setbacks throughout the early 2000's.
    Cut to 2015. I had just quit a job that had held me both, financially & spiritually hostage for nearly 10 years. I was now free to start a new life.
    It was here I would meet the Woman who changed my life. Because of my Anxiety, I had been previously unable to form any kind of relationship with anyone.
    I just wasn't capable as I was. My Wife to be, who also suffered from Depression & Anxiety understood me. Enough to take the ruination of a man she encountered &
    set me on the course I currently am on.
    I now work a 9 - 5 dayshift in a VERY Public place & not only have I been able to cope, but I have actually THRIVED in this position.
    So much so, that I have been described as being indispensable in my position!
    Imagine that. Going from a Socially Anxious person, who would go to great lengths to avoid people, to a happily married one, doing a job that only a few years ago
    would have been unthinkable!
    This is where I am today & I hope some of you can find inspiration in my story in that it IS possible to live with Mental Illness.
    Believe me, I know this isn't the end of the battle for me. I know I will always have my ups & downs. But if life can turn out for me, it can turn out for you!
    The best thing you can do for yourself is reach out. Talk to someone. Let people know what's going on for you. There IS help & therefore there is hope!
    I
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