Sometimes they just aren't any answers right now.

[Pinkviolet]

Good morning,

I have been venting on the same subject: Bipolar and the stigma I think it has with AA groups.

Then just a moment ago, I came upon a passage in a book that I have that caught my attention:


< Looking back to gauge your success only leads to self-doubt. Live in the present moment while fully experiencing the intensity of your current feelings instead of retreating to your past. The future is calling so let go of your baggage and move on. >


Yes, I do believe it is time to let go and live in the present moment. Thank you for <Finding your Strenght in Difficult Times, A book of Méditations, by David Viscott. >

[Thtufus]

I don't know much about bipolar, but I'm interested and I'm learning. I do know a bit about AA. It's probably kept me alive for several years and sane for most of them. I took a few years off about ten years ago, then went back two and a half years ago. I tried to tell them I was different (from them) but they didn't believe me. They said I was the same as them and I guess, technically, I was there for the same reason they were - to get help to stay sober.

Sure, things have changed drastically since before. My depression is so much more noticeable to me and probably to some of them, because alcoholism and mood disorders go together like branches of mental illness. My level of self esteem got so poor that I forgot my name, I was so scared at the second meeting I went to. I didn't realize at the time either that my depression had escalated so much. I had never before talked out loud about thoughts of suicide. So it is understandable to me why so many people flinch at the mention of any kind of mental illness in the meeting.


Thtufus

[paul m]

Hello Pinkviolet . Thtufus has some good points.

Having never been to an AA meeting I can't comment on what goes on there. However an AA meeting is just a group of people getting together and when ever people get together stigma may raise it's ugly head.

I've been at mental health peer support groups where stigma has raised it's ugly head. I remember one meeting we were voting as too whether or not to allow people with schizophrenia to attend our meetings. (we were a closed group at that time who only accept people with bipolar and/depression. )

The most common reason people gave as to why they didn't want schizophrenics at the meeting was because they would be A) disruptive,B) have nothing in common with us C)would not enjoy the meetings etc etc.

All hog wash of course, but that is what stigma often is: Good people making statements that they believe to be fact because they heard it somewhere else or just because of a lack of knowledge. Take Care. paul m

[MoMoe]

Hi Pinkviolet

I don't have any experience with AA directly - never been to a meeting, although my father was an alcoholic so AA was certainly a big part of my life. I do know that it was probably the only thing that was keeping him going for his last 8 years. He never spoke of stigma ever but he also had trouble admitting he himself was suffering from chronic depression for many years. Of course, that was only his experience though. Not trying to compare it to anything you have experienced. I have bipolar (and as thtufus says, alcohol cant be a big factor. I have to constantly keep my drinking in check. It is a very slippery slope) and decided to tell some people about it over the last couple of years. I can honestly say that while most have been supportive, I have certainly experienced stigma form others. I get treated different now by some, or they have just fallen off my radar. I think it has convinced me to back off on opening up to people about it. I often suffer in silence, as most of us do. For me, being able to have these types of conversations with all of you on this forum helps to make me feel "normal".

[dave]

Early in my recovery I went to AA almost daily and kept going regulary for years. I remain sober but do not regularly attend AA now. On many occasions at different meetings in the GTA I talked about my bipolar diagnosis. I do not recall any negative reactions to my admissions of my illness. Many other regular attendees at the meetings I went to shared their mental health stories. Many of them talked about managing bipolar as well.

[tonkatoy]

ive been suffering from manic episodes as well as the seemingly never ending depression that follows . it has done a number on my life . im on seriquil now . but i just suffered another manic episode not my worst one but never the less it cost me alot of humiliation . i used to go to AA but when i would become manic booze was the only thing that calmed me down . im still struggling to live with bipolar ,