Anxiety about Bipolar Medication

[MooDee]

Hi:

Anyone else have anxiety about bipolar medication side effects. I tried lithium for a bit but quickly became hypothyroid- it resolved when I stopped. Now am considering Epival but I am afraid of the side effects (liver issues, pancreatic issues, weight gain....) I keep thinking I can do this without meds...but I can't keep my mood level on my own. Lately I have been drinking way too much as a way to deal with my moods and anxiety. Ugh....anyone relate????

[paul m]

Hello MooDee and welcome. I can relate to everything you have said having been there and done that several times (more than likely multiple times LOL). Finding what works for treatment for bipolar is usually a long and complicated process. Sometimes a person will get lucky and get the right meds right away. In my experience those people are few and far between for the rest of us it's a long slogging and miserable process.

I'm no doctor and I have no medical training so I'm just another person writing on the internet. Don't take what I have to say 100% , but research it your self and come to your own conclusions. I also mean no criticism to anyone about the regime they follow, that is their choice and it may work very well for them. My thoughts are as follows.

Bipolar can be a very serious illness and those of us with it tend to die much younger (8.5yrs) than those without and the effect of suicide doesn't affect those stats very much. source http://www.medpagetoday.com/psychiat...disorder/40524 . We tend to abuse our bodies at various stages of the illness, leading to the decrease in yrs lived and from my own experiences some of us with bipolar seem to suffer from a lot of other illness too.

I don't like meds myself, but if I didn't have them, I would either be dead from suicide or dead from being homeless instead of enjoying life. There are a lot of draw backs to the meds that I take, but as I said I enjoy life these days. Will lithium eventually decrease my kidney function so far that I may die, that's possible, but for me lithium helps greatly and without it I would already be dead. (I know you said that you can't take lithium and I understand, I can't take epival because of the very serious side effects that it gives me).

My meds caused me to gain a lot of weight as well, but I'm slowly losing that weight and without them I wouldn't have made it this far. You mentioned drinking. Others may disagree, but I've never seen anyone ,and I've met 100's with serious bipolar, who could have more than a couple of drinks a week. For myself, I still drink, but only in very limited amounts. I don't have any great explanation why drinking affects us so much other than we all ready have a mood disorder and drinking causes our mood to alter. Also booze is a known depressant.

Some people do manage to regulate their bipolar without meds. Sometimes that all depends on how serious your bipolar is. They tend to live very regimented lives, eating healthy diets, exercising lots, closely controlling their social and environmental lives and watching their moods very closely.

For me it was a case of trying 30+ meds in about 100 different combos and learning to live a fairly regimented life. It was no fun doing this and at times I would still like to through away my meds and forget that I shouldn't eat healthy or maintain a certain life style, but as I said I am know enjoying life and that is what counts for me.

Bipolar is just like any other serious illness. Either you take steps to look after it or it will make your life miserable or kill you.

[AJ]

I don't have anything to add to what Paul has said, I just wanted to welcome you to the forum MooDee.

[uni]

Hello and welcome to the forums, MooDee. I love your name and avatar by the way! I think it's common to have anxiety about taking psych meds of any sort. The question I ask myself is "Am I better off with them or without them?" and go from there.

[quack424]

Hi there MooDee

After ten years, I needed something stronger than alcohol and nicotine. Currently, that is Epival and Abilify. I have far less side-effects from Epival than I had from Lithium years ago. Abilify packs a stronger punch, but hopefully that goes away in the next couple of months.
If you feel you need something, trust your instincts. Lots of combinations can be tried as long as your doctor knows what they are. If you just have a GP without a lot of experience, talk to a pharmacist and bring suggestions to your doc. (If your doc isn't a twit, they should be open or referring you to a psychiatrist.)