Mania and memory

[Gossip]

Does anyone else have memory gaps from severe manias? I've had my share of manias, but two in particular were quite spectacular. I knew I didn't remember every detail from those, and what I do remember is kind of disjointed and fragmented, and it's hard to tease out exactly what's true memory versus symptoms (hallucinations, delusions etc.). I got suicidal between my last two appointments, so naturally I called my doc. She made an off-hand comment during that phonecall that made me realise that I was definitely missing some information from those times, so I started asking my husband some questions about it. And I'm learning all sorts of things that I had no clue about. For one thing I was apparently committed under the mental health act for 30 days at one point... I literally had no idea until yesterday. They're required by law to explain your rights to you when they do that, but I have no memory of it. My hubby swears they did... he was there. And there's a lot of other stuff I didn't remember, too. So that started me wondering... are the memory gaps normal when it's that severe? Has anyone else on here experienced that?

[AJ]

That must have been quiet unsettling to find out that you have the memory gaps. I have a few blank spots from my manic episodes. I don't remember anything much about the trip to the hospital and being certified. I was aware of the blanks in memory somehow and did manage to fill most of them in by asking the nurses.

I seem to struggle more since those episodes with short term memory issues.

[MissMoods]

Yes, there are large gaps of my twenties I do not remember. From when I was diagnosed at twenty, until about age thirty, I was very unstable. It is bothersome but I think there is nothing that can be done.
on the other hand, if you have someone in your life who is aware this is an issue for you, that may be helpful going forward.

[Gossip]

Not that I'm glad you both have experienced it too... obviously I'm not... but it makes me feel better to know that it's not just me! I knew there were gaps, and that my memories weren't clear, but I had no idea that something that significant was just... not there! Even after my mania last fall, I said to both my husband and the doc that even though I'd been hyper***ual, I hadn't cheated as far as I was aware, because I know that I don't always remember everything that's happened. I was hoping I'd at least remember something that significant if I had, but maybe not...? (still pretty sure I was faithful!)

[MissMoods]

Uh. That’s a weird one. I cheated on someone once and didn’t mean to? The excuse did not work. But as far as I know, I always remembered doing it, I just had a hard time remembering names, which was dumb. Ughhhh.

[Gossip]

From last fall I know for sure that there are some days missing, which is why I felt the need to qualify it when I was saying it to them. I do have a favourite part of this disease, but that definitely isn't it!