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    Advice

    So, I have the place to myself for a while and I have a number of things I want to get done, but I can't find any motivation. Is anyone else dealing with this? I'm going crazy (moreso)! What sorts of skills can I use to help me focus and just get stuff done.

    #2
    As lame as this sounds, I make a list and I do just one. After one, I'm usually so proud of myself that I do more. Honestly though, I also need help with this, so I'm interested in the responses.

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      #3
      I can't even make a list. Well, I have a list of sorts in my head, I know how to do what I need to finish these projects, but I just... bleagh...It seems that I don't have the energy to bother or care (even though I'm experiencing emotions, whereas last week I was devoid of all enthusiasm). It's so frustrating because I've been planning to get things finished while my wife was/is out of town, but I just can't care enough about anything.

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        #4
        I do the same thing you do catman. I make a short term goal list (otherwise it's too overwhelming). I have to keep it short or else I just get even more stressed and anxious about not getting anything done. Some of the tasks I write down are easy to do and take little time. That serves the purpose of encouraging me to carry on seeing my accomplishments. 'Take out the garbage' counts for example. 'Plan the rest of your life' does not!
        AJ

        Humans punish themselves endlessly
        for not being what they believe they should be.
        -Don Miguel Ruiz-

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          #5
          I'm feeling okay about myself today: I got to the gym and made a nice lunch, but I still can't muster the energy to work on my projects. I think the biggest problem is that I'm fairly closer to finishing one and I need to finish the small details, which is super boring. I'm trying, though...

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            #6
            Hi guilt-n-shame. My hat's off to you for going to the gym and for making a nice lunch. You're ahead of the game already

            I can think of one tactic that's worked for me when unmotivated to do something. Agree with myself to work at it for a short length of time, anywhere from a couple of minutes to an hour. Whether I finish or not is beside the point; at least I've done some little thing, which is better than nothing. Progress!

            I came across a related idea in a how-to-study book. When studying for exams or writing essays I would tell myself "The first five minutes are the worst." And it's true. I still use that trick sometimes. After the first five minutes I often find myself "into" the thing and actually want to keep going.
            Last edited by uni; August 19, 2016, 01:33 PM. Reason: Punk- tuation
            uni

            ~ it's always worth it ~

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              #7
              I honestly feel like keeping a list in my head makes it more difficult because I have to remember the list each time I think about it. Even if you think it all comes naturally to your head, you might have some unconscious stress growing. Maybe just try jotting it down? Could help to even break it up. For example, (and I'm not kidding this actually helps me) if I'm fixing something: 1. get my tools out. For cleaning, 1. clear the table by putting it *near* where it should end up, 2. wipe the table, 3. break down the putting away by doing it in sections... rather than saying "clean the house". That will never, ever get done if I think of it that way.

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                #8
                Thanks for the advice, uni, I tend to forget that any work I put into something, whether it be 5 minutes of 5 hours, it's still working towards the final product.

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                  #9
                  Ok this is a short trip down memory lane.

                  What Catman has posted about breaking things down into really small parts reminds me of the first depression education/support group I ever attended. There was a lady there who made quilts. She had a big pile of fabric squares off in a corner in her house, and she saw this pile every day and felt really awful about not sewing them together, but couldn't bring herself to tackle it. Or even move the pile, for that matter. I'll never forget the therapist coming up with the novel idea of sewing one square a day onto her quilt. That's it. I don't know whether she ever got the whole pile done, because the group sessions ended and I never saw her again, but during the time the group was still going she would report back about the one square a day and how the pile was actually getting smaller. I think she probably sewed them together by hand, which would make it even more of an accomplishment than doing it by machine, although that too would still be progress.

                  Anyway, that whole situation of hers, and how it was apparently ok (imagine!) to do only a small part of something if that's all you can handle, was a revelation to me. I guess I always figured you did it all, and fast, or why bother? Probably an old message from my growing up years. So I had to kind of un-learn it and then re-learn a new way of looking at it. Obviously the quilt thing made an impression on me, because it has prompted this little memory lane excursion
                  uni

                  ~ it's always worth it ~

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