tad nervous and trying to figure out once I'm out of hospital I'll manage but I'm sure I'll figure out a way. My pseudo partner and I really haven't been getting on at all. He's a denial type of alcholic who knows all. I've tried having conversation, practised the wording and tone and so keeping the list of his adjectives that he's been using to describe me. Oh did I mention that even with a knee that needs replacing and well a spine (with they could do that) that I more than looked after him for two months. He still insists that it was an pneumonia it was an acute pancreatitis attack. Here nor there but I haven't been imaginating the detachment before the illness and those wee things that occur when your partner checks out. no kissing, walking no less than 10 feet in front of you when u have to use a walker or cane. Yes I tried everything in my arsenal, I've been married which I refuse to compare him to but certain signs are universal. Down to maybe a quick peck for a kiss I'd have to dress up in these outfits for *** and still not a kiss (trust me it wasn't this way over a year ago. I'm sure a john shows more emotion. Yes I'm trying to find a place just medical retirement doesn't give me enough leeway to pay utilities and medicial equipment. I also have to make sure if I can no longer pay for repairs I'm at an affordable cab ride to hospital and doctors.
About a month and a half ago instead of my stuff all jammed in my closet and storage I've just been putting it in storage. Yeah his idea of we can make room for both our things, he puts my meds etc at the bottom of the kitty corner cabinet with cat food if you see what I mean. Yes I've asked, beg, explained etc. He likes using my car to go to work (I pay the insurance which is extra due to using for work, I pay repairs, so far after straight out saying he's put in 40 dollars of gas in two months, I pay the condo insurance with all bells and whistle like he wanted. I've paid someone to vacumn and cleaned car and my bathroom. He doesn't do cleaning except emptying the dishwasher. I stopped paying for the groceries that would cost 200 and 25 would be mine. It goes on but ah guilt of him being stuck with a cripple I've even had to taxi for my appointments ah and a few weeks ago was lucky a friend took me to the epidural lumbar steriod needle on the other end of town. Oh yes he doesn't text anymore. My 50th b day I got a cupcake with buttered icing (lactose issues) oh and two cards with a total for both 6 words.
Last night was apparently he's never seen me really depressed. Odd I haven't (even my pdoc said I was doing well and she knows her shit). He's more peeved maybe that he can't use the car so much I have lots of appointments. Yeah I lie but why should he have access before me and not even for me etc.
Oh and he says there is no difference between I love you or I'm in love with you. He doesn't even attempt *** anymore. I've always enjoyed ***. Okay sorry but last nights' he knows all about depression when he never ever would come to a meeting, read anything I gave him or sent via email. Bidding my time till I can afford a place and he knows it as we are just roommates.
He gets upset if I say something, the tone either, I'm just agreeing no sarcasm either.
Seriously if I could play the recordings (I'm double checking I'm remembering if I said things wrongs or tones) oh yeah ow I've been visiting friends on the weekends (he sleeps all morning and hits the pub all afternoon). I know when I've hit depression not it.
Thank all of you for listening
About a month and a half ago instead of my stuff all jammed in my closet and storage I've just been putting it in storage. Yeah his idea of we can make room for both our things, he puts my meds etc at the bottom of the kitty corner cabinet with cat food if you see what I mean. Yes I've asked, beg, explained etc. He likes using my car to go to work (I pay the insurance which is extra due to using for work, I pay repairs, so far after straight out saying he's put in 40 dollars of gas in two months, I pay the condo insurance with all bells and whistle like he wanted. I've paid someone to vacumn and cleaned car and my bathroom. He doesn't do cleaning except emptying the dishwasher. I stopped paying for the groceries that would cost 200 and 25 would be mine. It goes on but ah guilt of him being stuck with a cripple I've even had to taxi for my appointments ah and a few weeks ago was lucky a friend took me to the epidural lumbar steriod needle on the other end of town. Oh yes he doesn't text anymore. My 50th b day I got a cupcake with buttered icing (lactose issues) oh and two cards with a total for both 6 words.
Last night was apparently he's never seen me really depressed. Odd I haven't (even my pdoc said I was doing well and she knows her shit). He's more peeved maybe that he can't use the car so much I have lots of appointments. Yeah I lie but why should he have access before me and not even for me etc.
Oh and he says there is no difference between I love you or I'm in love with you. He doesn't even attempt *** anymore. I've always enjoyed ***. Okay sorry but last nights' he knows all about depression when he never ever would come to a meeting, read anything I gave him or sent via email. Bidding my time till I can afford a place and he knows it as we are just roommates.
He gets upset if I say something, the tone either, I'm just agreeing no sarcasm either.
Seriously if I could play the recordings (I'm double checking I'm remembering if I said things wrongs or tones) oh yeah ow I've been visiting friends on the weekends (he sleeps all morning and hits the pub all afternoon). I know when I've hit depression not it.
Thank all of you for listening
Comment