Anxiety

[Hazelcat]

Any one else here deal with severe/extreme Anxiety? I have had moderate depression for years but my worst problem is anxiety and the fatigue from constantly being on edge.

I grew up with an abusive parent and was constantly vigilant and "walking on eggshells." Always fearing the next verbal/emotional (and sometimes physical) assault.

I hide it well from others. Most people would probably say I don't SEEM that anxious, but hiding it was also a survival skill (the few times I had a panic attack as a child/teen, I was punished for it). Whenever I take a test like the Burns Anxiety inventory, I score very high.

I do find that techniques like meditation help somewhat, especially since I started doing meditation with the "Om" sound which is a kind of humming that apparently stimulates the vagus nerve (which runs behind your throat) and thus activates the parasympathetic nervous system. But after meditating, a few hours later I just feel like I go straight back into fight or flight mode.

Exercise seems to help as well although none of these things actually is a "cure."

I have the usual physical disorders associated with high anxiety - fatigue, acid reflux, IBS.

Medications don't help (apart from benzos which I don't take much due to the fact that they are habit forming). I currently take a low dose of Amitriptyline.

What helps you with anxiety?

[bucky310]

Hi Hazelcat,

I'm sorry to hear you're having some bad anxiety. I've dealt with that on and off in my past as well.

I do find meditation helps me as well. I personally try to do the "no mind" style of meditation where I try to not think about anything. Definitely hard at first but becomes a bit easier with practice.

I've also been able to get a lot of help with breathing techniques. I do what I think they call a breathing square. But I also modify it a bit. In for a count of 4, hold for a count of 4, out for a count of 6, hold for a count of 4, repeat. I find that this helps a lot if I am able to catch when my anxiety is about to begin at the onset of it.

I've also been through therapy which helps the most for me. Being able to talk through my issues with a professional is very comforting. It also helps to have the right therapist. My doctor is definitely the right fit for me and I had tried someone else at a point who just wasn't connecting with me properly.

Exercise helps me too. I need to do more of it though.

I'm also on the same boat as you to stray away from taking things for my anxiety. I'd also rather not form habits.

Sounds like you're doing the right things to me. I'm certain you can get through this. Keep it up

Take care.

[sandy11]

Hi Hazelcat thank you so much for sharing.

I can also completely relate to the feeling of being on edge and feeling fatigued by anxiety. I have also not had much luck with medications but have had great experiences with therapy. Something I've learned from therapy that has helped me the most is perspective-taking and self-talk.

Although practicing both felt quite strange at the time, it became more natural to have these dialogues with myself whenever I felt anxious.

Some self-affirmations/questions that I use are:

"I am having a hard time with [situation] right now, but [situation] will eventually work itself out in some form and I will be okay."

"If someone I cared about was going through this, what advice could I tell them in this moment?"

"I am in control of whatever I can control and I believe in myself to manage whatever else comes my way."

Box breathing, as bucky310 mentioned, has also helped me a lot whenever I'm feeling overwhelmed. Additionally, gentle exercises, listening to music, and listening to high-frequency tones have also helped me to declutter my mind. I hope these techniques can be of help to you as well.

[uni]

I have used the box breathing too, when nothing else seems to work or when I just can't think of anything else!

Otherwise, I challenge my thoughts. Like, instead of thinking an upcoming event will be awful, I say, what if it goes well? Or if I feel victimized, say what kind of ripples can I send out instead? I also love The Desiderata, sort of a poem/writeup from years ago. Here is a link:Desiderata: Original Text

[Hazelcat]

Thanks for the responses. I am in therapy. For me the anxiety is more of a constant low-level hum than cyclical or periodic. I don't usually even notice it unless I pay attention, because I'm so used to living this way. However, I've watched neurobiologists on YouTube talk about how meditation changes the brain (and actually shrinks brain areas associated with stress and aggression) so I'm trying to meditate every day.

[Francois Le Couche]

Sorry that you're having to endure this, Hazelcat. I have bipolar 2, but have suffered through many, many panic attacks and episodes of high anxiety. For me, it's a combination of meds, proper sleep, and exercise.

I also learned this from my mother, who recently passed: challenge the anxiety. Tell it that you're not afraid of it. "Bring it on!" my mom would say. When I do this, and truly believe what I'm saying, it takes a lot of the air out of the anxiety.

I hope this helps. Remember, anxiety sucks, but it can't hurt you. God bless.

[Jafar the wizard]

Sorry , Hazel cat for missing this post .. my comment is 8 months late .. I hope you feel better now

[Hazelcat]

Sorry , Hazel cat for missing this post .. my comment is 8 months late .. I hope you feel better now

No problem. Thanks for the response. I'm not sure that the constant hum of anxiety is something that will "get better" at least not completely, but I do try to manage it.

I think when you spend the first 19 years of your life walking on eggshells, that may be not something that ever goes away. I've always just done stuff anyway but I think at some level the anxiety makes me exhausted sooner.