O.A.

[uni]

Checking in. I ran into some trouble over the last couple of days, and obviously have yet to get a handle on how to deal with weekends. My boyfriend and I are together then, and it's harder to stick to things than when I'm on my own. But it's all an "opportunity" to learn, I suppose.

I have a lot to work on, but as usual it's one day at a time, one little step at a time, a few steps forward and a few steps back.... my whole life seems to work that way. Oh my, that sounds strangely normal-ish, like everyone else in the world. Neat! But I don't think there's any danger of me becoming a total normie. And there is something to be said for that too

[ladyswan]

Hi uni,

I used to attend Anorexics & Bulimics Anon and I think it was mostly the same. There's something you were fuzzy about:

The focus, though, is on "abstaining" from certain foods or actions that pertain to "compulsive overeating". I am a little fuzzy on some of it at this point, but will continue to investigate.

What you're talking about is referred to as "insane eating practices" and its corresponding "physical allergy" to the practices. In other words, an overeater cannot expect to have one piece of cake if it's something he's always binged on. The habit is too engrained. The rush from binging on cake is an allergen to be avoided.

Hope this helps!

[Atlantis]

Hi Uni,
Thanks for sharing...I also weigh in a healthy range for my body type, but I am now at the maximum weight for that range and I will be trying to lose 10-15 pounds over the next few months. Keep us posted on how you are doing.

[Re-O]

Hi,

I have found a solution for my wanting to eat the whole house out of food days. I live with my brother and since I typically cook, I eat half of what he eats since he eats a fair amount. (darn people with high metabolisms) Of course, on really hard days, I try to convince him to eat more :/

[uni]

An update... I'm starting to take to this OA stuff. Unfortunately there are no meetings in my town. I get to them when I can in my boyfriend's city, and feel very accepted and hopeful when I attend. I actually have lost about 4 pounds, although due to ugly weather I haven't been walking so may have gained a couple back. But it's the changing of habits rather than the weight which is the focus. Changing eating habits is freaking HARD

[astronaut]

Hi Uni,

I changed my eating habits a long time ago. I never found it too difficult; however, I believe that it is different for each individual. Once I stopped eating certain foods, I never craved them again. I eat very well now.

The walking is a great activity also. I wish I could go walking with you; I'm always looking for company on my long walks!

astronaut

[uni]

Time for an update. I'm still very happy with how O.A. is helping me. This despite the fact that I've probably gained back the few pounds I had lost. Each time I fall into emotional eating (almost every day), I feel like I have learned something about what NOT to do.

This is not about dieting, it is about getting my internal house in order when the familiar - and therefore comfortable - thing is disarray. What I feel inside has everything to do with my overeating. It is hard to realize that despite all the work over the years on "getting my act together" (with a lot of success if I say so myself), there is more "stuff" coming up from underneath! I wonder whether all the energy and time I spent on holding down my job was also holding down some of this emotional "stuff". I am having to face some of my fears - ack! A big one is allowing myself to be vulnerable by sharing my true thoughts and feelings with others. I have been doing well here on the forums, but still wary face-to-face.

With travelling around this past while, I have not made it to many O.A. meetings. Plus, my e-mail, once I got computer access again, has changed its setup thanks to freaking SaskTel, and I have thrown up my hands in frustration and won't use it until I am patient enough to deal with phoning the help line (for help in English, press 1...and on and on...you know the drill..). Therefore I have probably cut off my nose to spite my face, because I did send the occasional e-mail to an O.A. person.

Anyway, yesterday I promised myself that I would call an O.A. person in the evening (cheaper - I have no long distance "bundle" because it's usually not worth it, although that could change). Well, guess what? I ended up going to an unexpected "early" birthday get-together for a friend, got back after 10 pm, and decided it was too late to phone anyone. However, not to late to scarf down fatty food in front of the TV. Crap.

So here I am, 1:15 pm, and who cares about long distance charges, I am going to phone an O.A. person...

Is something changing inside me reflected in my minor, but to me significant, progress in de-cluttering my apartment? But OMG I have a long way to go

[uni]

Me again. So proud of myself for phoning the O.A. person - who btw wasn't home, so I left a message. So I phoned a second person and we talked only briefly because she had company arriving. However, she phoned me back (we're playing telephone tag) when I was out. I will call her tomorrow. Minor progress in asking for help, but progress nevertheless

Adding this the next morning: called her again, she was out, I left a message. I'll be gone for another few days (again!) so will try to reach her by cell phone while I'm away. She had said to me when we spoke before, that my call was an answer to prayer, because she needs to connnect too. I felt good about that; it's always an upper for me to know that I'm useful in this world, and can make a difference, however small

P.S. - I'm going camping. Sort of. Will update when I get back. I'll be missing you guys. Au revoir.

[astronaut]

Have fun camping, Uni and good for you for making those calls. Keep it up!

[AJ]

Don't forget the sunscreen and bug spray!

[paul m]

Have fun Uni. Take Care. paul m

[uni]

Never did update about the camping. Suffice it to say it went well. And - lucky me - I'm now in charge of organizing next year's family campout. Well, I guess it's about time I took a turn.

I plan to keep it simple. These things tend to get out of hand, like 92 different desserts and 12 kinds of chicken wings for snacks, etc... I exaggerate, but the food thing makes me nervous and overwhelmed. I want to camp and play and visit, for crying out loud, not graze at a smorgasbord for 3 days

I've noticed, though, that the food is a big deal to some individuals, and a major reason they enjoy the weekend. So those people will bring the dozens of desserts and wings no matter what. Therefore, I'm thinking a very loose plan is the way to go. My family members have trouble getting a consensus on anything. Some like structure and some will rebel against it on principle.

Scenarios involving family and eating always bring on my food issues. I want to have a better relationship with it, and with them, but for some reason I have a hard time doing so. Food on its own can be trouble, and family on their own can be trouble, and the two together are very dicey.

I fear I have only scratched the surface in all this. But that's okay; a day at a time. And another psychologist visit

[Lizzy]

Food and family that's always potent. I admire the fact that you keep working at it.

[uni]

Thanks Lizzy. We shall endeavor to persevere!

[uni]

Well, being away from home for almost three weeks has not been good for my eating. Yikes! There is more to it, like running into nausea - I think thanks to taking too many multivitamins and my new osteporosis meds - and therefore unable to do much exercise. I've since seen my GP and we've reduced the vites, but so far still taking the meds (and calcium).

Now that I'm home I'm *starting* to get back on track. It's hard. But I finally had a chance to hit an OA meeting this past weekend, which I found encouraging. I also can text one of the members if I want. And I have sent the odd email. There's a group phone list coming out soon too, which will be good to have.

I've always had trouble reaching out to people, even friends and family sometimes. It seems to be a part of my personality or something. In any case, I know I do better in life when I can get myself to pick up the phone, or get to a meeting, or at least post on here (the easiest, and very helpful, but still not "real world" interaction). I'm sure there are irrational fears and anxieties that hold me back, and I have yet to conquer. It has improved with time and effort, though, so I'm moving in the right direction. I do hope that someday I'll be more comfortable with it, that's all.

So at the moment I'm encourage and discouraged at the same time - if that's possible