Hi,
first off, I want to mention that I am currently seeing a therapist to work on my issues.
I have developed over the years and immense fear of failure at the professional level. Succeeding academically and professionally has became tremendously important to me. It is what has given me a sense of control over my life.
I come from a low-income family background and I'm afraid of ending up like my parents. I've been mocked out in school as well due to this particular situation in my city.
However, I do not feel like I am succeeding to my own standards. I compare myself to other people in my community who are accomplishing everything I want to accomplish in life and it feels like what I do is never good or impressive enough to get scholarships, awards and opportunities that i am aiming at. And it makes me extremely anxious and depressed. I'm afraid that my turn will never come when it comes to succeeding in life. I am also a visible minority and there is a lack of role models in my community. I don't feel represented with the models of success that I'm currently seeing which makes me double more anxious to not be able to succeed due to the color of my skin, and despite my enormous efforts. Everybody acknowledges that I am working extremely hard but to my eyes, and to the standards that I set for myself, it never seems to be good enough.
first off, I want to mention that I am currently seeing a therapist to work on my issues.
I have developed over the years and immense fear of failure at the professional level. Succeeding academically and professionally has became tremendously important to me. It is what has given me a sense of control over my life.
I come from a low-income family background and I'm afraid of ending up like my parents. I've been mocked out in school as well due to this particular situation in my city.
However, I do not feel like I am succeeding to my own standards. I compare myself to other people in my community who are accomplishing everything I want to accomplish in life and it feels like what I do is never good or impressive enough to get scholarships, awards and opportunities that i am aiming at. And it makes me extremely anxious and depressed. I'm afraid that my turn will never come when it comes to succeeding in life. I am also a visible minority and there is a lack of role models in my community. I don't feel represented with the models of success that I'm currently seeing which makes me double more anxious to not be able to succeed due to the color of my skin, and despite my enormous efforts. Everybody acknowledges that I am working extremely hard but to my eyes, and to the standards that I set for myself, it never seems to be good enough.
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