Putting yourself first

[Jafar the wizard]

It's hard for me to put myself first .. and it's hard for me to distinguish the difference between ( putting one's self first ) and ( being selfish ) ..
Selfish people make me feel disgusted .. and that makes it even harder and harder for me to put myself first .. because putting myself first make me hate myself and feel guilty ..
..
And I can't tolerate seeing people being selfish .. and most probably I won't forgive them .. I might even be very rude to them and punish them for that .. or at least stay away from them for years .. maybe forever ..
I know that's a bit extreme and deep inside I know it's not healthy and it makes me feel more depressed ..

[AJ]

Hi Jafar. The only way taking care of myself sits ok with me, is think of it as I'm not more important than anyone else, but I am just as important. I don't know if that would be helpful to you.

[Jafar the wizard]

Hi A J
I hear you .. but to ( take care of yourself ) is a bit different from ( putting yourself first ) ..
To put yourself first means being ( more important ) not ( as important ) ..
And I don't mind considering myself ( more important ) which makes it even harder to copy others and be selfish like them ..
..
Moreover , being like them doesn't make me feel ( as important as them ) .. it makes me feel ( as unimportant as them ) ..
that's how I see it ..

[Jafar the wizard]

The past few years where not only hard on me but hard on most of us ..
To survive during a crisis we need to collaborate as a group .. and it's not just an ethical problem .. being selfish is immature , short slighted and not smart at all ..

[AJ]

Hi Jafar. I agree, during a crisis collaboration is a good thing, maybe we don't even need it to be a crisis.