Sigh

[AJ]

I still feel really low but yesterday's break from my thoughts of suicide helped.

[Christina]

How are you doing today? Hope you are doing ok. You will get over this rough patch.

[AJ]

I'm hanging in there. I've been trying to keep myself busy so that my mind isn't preoccupied with suicidal thoughts. It's nice here today so I spent some time puttering around in the yard. Another 2 hrs. and it will be time to take the dog for a walk. A friend is coming over for supper tonight. I don't feel like socializing, but once the visit starts I can be engaged in the conversation. Thanks for asking.

[uni]

Hi AJ. Good for you with the socializing when you really don't feel like it. I hope the evening went well.

AJ, are the suicidal thoughts tapering off at all? How do you handle them, other than distracting yourself? You are in my thoughts as well as my prayers. Please remember we need you here on the forum

[Determined]

Hi AJ. Hoping your day goes well.

[AJ]

The visit with a friend was a nice distraction. I didn't feel much like talking so I let her carry the conversation. She likes to talk so it worked out well!

Other than distracting myself I have not been able to use any of my usual coping methods.

Thanks for your thoughts and prayers Uni.

Thanks for the hugs Determined.

[AJ]

Today is a new day, at least that's what I keep telling myself. It will be my mantra for the day.

[Christina]

Yes, absolutely. I love having a mantra of the day. When I'm feeling really low, I just tell myself to be strong. It helps.

[paul m]

Hello AJ. How be I do something to tick you off? That might get your mind off of your own demise and perhaps wishing for mine .

I don't think that I've really ticked you off for 5-6 or more yrs and my shoulders are broad. What would you like me to post about that you can say "that idiot....." Nothing like getting a little mad to get the adrenaline going.

Just kidding of course. For those who are new here, on the old forum AJ removed one of my posts. As I know that AJ hates removing posts, I'm sure that AJ had several less than kind thoughts that day. Of course eventually AJ got revenge and had me made a moderator. So I had better be careful about what I say or I'll end up with an even worse punishment LOL.

I hope that you feel better soon. Hang in there AJ . Take Care. paul m P.S when I say my shoulders are really broad, they didn't used to be, then I started taking Seroquel. Now I'm just broad everywhere LOL.

[AJ]

Thanks for the chuckle Paul. Your sense of humour, and friendship are much appreciated. Thanks for the hugs too.

[AJ]

I feel so bad today. Depressed doesn't describe the half of it. Ugh. I am very weary from just hanging in there.

[Fighting back]

Hi AJ,

Looks like it's been a rough three weeks. You have always been there for all of us and now it's your turn. I know I cannot address the root of the problem, but I just wanted you to know you are in my thoughts and I wish you the best of success in fighting back the current wave of demons. You will win!

[AJ]

Thanks for the words of encouragement Fighting back. I'm sure I will find my way through this, even though it doesn't feel like it.

[paul m]

Hello AJ. If you can't get out of this low, perhaps you may have to go to the ER. Take Care. paul m

[AJ]

I've been wrestling with the idea. I see my Pdoc on Wednesday. I'm honestly not sure that she can do anything that will help keep me out of the hospital. I keep holding on hoping things will get better, and somewhere in me I know that they will, but when! Thanks for the hugs Paul.