by Eden A.
It was the day and time my doctor was going to call. We meet bi-weekly, or every few weeks, and I just give her a mental health update, and she checks in on how I’m doing with my antidepressants.
I remember it like yesterday, the tears flood my eyes.
I got emotional remembering my trauma. Normally, near the end of the session – she asks if I have any questions. Like usual, I say no, and ask if we can book our next appointment. But, it didn’t even get to that point. She told me something along the lines of how she will be going away for a bit, and doesn’t know when she will be back. She mentioned her parents are not the best and needs to take care of them.
At this point, she doesn’t know when, or if, she will ever be back.
I began to cry even more, as she booked me in with another clinician to check on me, and hopefully to see my therapist a few days earlier to cope with the difficult emotion from my doctor leaving.
Then, she asked if it would be better to see her on video one last time, but I knew it would make me worse.
She was the best person I ever had. Even more tears fell as she asked what I did to cope when my previous doctor had to leave. I mentioned that writing letters of how much I missed her and how I felt helped me deal with the transition.
She gave me encouragement, mentioned how far and successful I am, and that she would like to receive letters, especially from me. Then, we ended the call.
This was the most recent experience I’ve had with saying goodbye. But, this wasn’t my first time I had to say goodbye to a professional I was close to, and who I had a connection with.
Goodbyes are so damn tough!
